Tag: forward thinking

When we resist transition

As we consider what it means to make a transition in life, one of the aspects of this process is to examine in oneself how previous times of change have gone. While no two situations are the same, there are clear commonalities in how operate when we reach a transition point in life. Yet, when we look back in an effort to gain perspective, there are times when we gloss over key elements of how previous situations worked. In William Bridges’ Transitions, he describes this resistance as his third rule of being in transition (see links for rule one and rule two):

Although it is advantageous to understand your own style of endings, some part of you will resist that understanding as though your life depended on it.

p. 15

I often find that one’s desire for a new beginning is so great that they will ignore the searching of self needed to know what worked in the past. People tend to want to assume that the past self cannot help the current self determine what the future self will need for the journey. While it is important not to bring all one’s baggage along on the new journey, all new journeys are informed by the events of the past.

As an exercise, notice the next time you are thinking about a transition what past situations comes to mind. I would offer that you might be surprised to relive stories of younger years that at first glance don’t seem to relate. It might be a relationship gone bad, a choice that you made which you wish you could do over, a conversation you wish you hadn’t had. Whatever the memory, instead of trying to block it out or trying to ignore it, sit with it and investigate what it might be trying to tell you now.

As you work towards your new journey, may the memories of past changes be a helpful guide to your molding your new self.

If you are someone in the process of creating your own new beginning, New Beginnings Spiritual Coaching and Consulting LLC is here to help. For more information, please check out: https://achaplainsnewjourney.wordpress.com/about/

New ways and the past

I recently started reading and reflecting on a book called Transitions: Making Sense of Life’s Changes by William Bridges. I plan to share some of my thoughts on this book in a series of posts. For now, I want to begin with one of the first points the author makes in reflecting on transitions.

Rule number one: When you’re in transition, you find yourself coming back in new ways to old activities.

p. 7

As we work to make changes, or we find ourselves in the midst of a change , many of us will fall back on the familiar to help navigate the new road. While change presumes a break from the past, and this break is a necessity to affect true transition and change, it is within the familiar that we find our inner strength and resolve to move forward.

For more information about New Beginnings Spiritual Coaching and Consulting LLC, and how we can support you on the journey through the waves of life, please check out: https://achaplainsnewjourney.wordpress.com/about/

The journey into darkness and light

from darkness into light

Over Shabbat I read the following analogy that I believe speaks to the idea of a New Beginning:

When a person is traveling away from his town, his path becomes darker and darker, because the lights of the town are further and further away. But the closer he gets to ending his journey, the closer he is to finding the next town, he begins to see the lights of the town even before he gets there. The lights of the coming town begin to light up his path, even though he is not yet there yet.

When we head out on a new road, we leave behind what we knew. The knowledge of the past fades like the lights of the town as we keep traveling on the road. The road in front of us is scary as we can’t see what is ahead. Yet, as we move along the path, we are also coming closer to a new destination. As we come closer, the “end,” which is the new start, becomes clearer and clearer.

Each day, as we journey forward, we are confronted with this constant going from known to unknown to known again. If we can be mindful that the journey will lead us to a new knowledge, a new “light” we can travel forward with confidence, facing any obstacles along the way because we know the way will be illuminated for us.

May each of you travel your road to a new beginning with the knowledge that it might look dark along the way but really it is a clear path when you reach the next stop along your journey.

New beginnings

Why a new blog? Why a new page and a new start? Over the years, I have started and stopped a few blogs. I am proud of the work I have done. I am grateful to have written and reflected on many topics. Yet, I realize that it was time to leave the past behind. This is not to say I won’t rehash some of my old ideas and thoughts. Rather, I want a fresh place to begin again.

Too often, we presume that we are merely on a single lane highway, just moving forward in time, accumulating more and more stories and events in life. While this is partially true, in reality our highway curves and has detours. The trouble is we sometimes lose sight of those changes on our journey. I attribute this to finding ourselves living too much in the past. Living in the past can hinder our ability to live in the present and hope for a better future. I have seen this idea written about countless times in spiritual memoirs and self-help books. To truly grow, one must build off of but not remain tied to the past. We must constantly work to evolve.

This same point is true for me and my journey. I want to build on all that I have been and also untie myself from being stuck in my ways because it’s always the way it has been. This is not a repudiation of my life’s journey. Rather it is an attitude adjustment to how I want to go forward day by day.

Please join me on this journey. I look forward to learning and growing together.