Category: Prayer

“For Your Sake Living God”

In the midst of the period between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, there are liturgical additions that help frame the focus of these 10 days. One of the phrases is:

“זָכְרֵֽנוּ לְחַיִּים מֶֽלֶךְ חָפֵץ בַּחַיִּים וְכָתְבֵֽנוּ בְּסֵֽפֶר הַחַיִּים לְמַעַנְךָ אֱלֹהִים חַיִּים:

Remember us for life, King, Who desires life, and inscribe us in the Book of Life, for Your sake Living God.”

The other day, as I was reciting these words, I found myself shuddering when I came to the last phrase “for Your sake, Living God.” I began experiencing a sense that it is so difficult to live up to an ideal that if all else fails, we hope we can rely upon, “for Your sake…” inscribe us for good. As I was lost in this awesome moment, I was reminded of a short piece I recently read in Growing Each Day, a daily reader written by Rabbi Dr. Abraham Twerski o.b.m.. After asking what the phrase “for Your sake” means, Rabbi Twerski suggests a creative read of the prayer:

We might read the verse a bit differently. “Inscribe us in the book of a life that is lived for Your sake.” In other words, we pray not only for life, but for a quality of life that is meaningful and purposeful, one that will be lived for the greater glory of God (p. 5)…

Of course, we wish to be inscribed in the book of life, but it should be a life that we wish to be in rather than one that we seek to escape from (ibid.)

We recite these words during the 10 days of repentance as a focus on our striving for an ideal life of meaning, or spirit, of Godliness. I shuddered because it is an awesome and lofty goal that recognizes how hard it would be to reach. During this period, we look to formulate our ideal self, turning in prayer to God recognizing our imperfections and expressing a deep sense of hope to start clean.

Years ago, in a similar way, standing in prayer on Yom Kippur, reciting the words of confessions, the Viddui, I found myself suddenly laughing at the seeming absurdity of striving for forgiveness for all the myriad mistakes we make and will find ourselves making year in and year out. The laughter came from a place of fear, as if I didn’t laugh, I would have felt crushed by how truly difficult change is. I realized in that moment the goal of Viddui, the goal of this entire period is a striving, a framing of who we hope our ideal selves will be. And when we emerge from Yom Kippur, the question will be: do we have the opportunity afforded to us by being in the book of life to work on living towards our ideal self throughout the coming period between Yom Kippur and the next Rosh Hashanah? Will we carry forward the image of who we want to be during the doldrums of the remainder of the year?

May this new year of 5782 and this period be one of deep introspection in finding the ideal you so that we can take the opportunity to hit pause and beginning anew with a new goal, a new purpose and a new mission in our lives.

Ritual for coming into the present moment

Prayer is a verbal encounter with G-d, with the divine in our lives. Prayer is also a series of actions and rituals which help the body engage with the mind and soul in this spiritual, mystical encounter. In the Jewish tradition, the central prayer of the thrice daily services is referred to as Shemoneh Esrai, the 18, referring to the 18 (now 19) prayers/blessings. These prayers connect one to a deep, personal and communal relation with Gd, requesting for the restoration of what Jews would consider an ideal society and lifestyle. Before the beginning of this part of the service, the tradition is to take three steps back from the position one is standing in and then take three steps forward back into the initial position. I recently came across a sweet and deep explanation offered as to what is behind this ritual of movement.

And so, before beginning the Amidah, the quintessence of prayer, we take three steps back as if to clear ourselves of thoughts of the future, and then we take three steps forward, as if to clear our consciousness of the past. Then we can stand with ha’kol, “everything,” all of ourselves, in the simplicity of the present moment, to attune to and engage the Ribbono Shel Olam – the Source of Everything – and to address our immediate reality and our current needs. The rivers of past and future mingle, converge and fan out across the ground of the present moment. In the Amidah we stand firmly on stable ground with Hashem, opening ourselves and our hearts in prayer, touching eternity. Contact with the Infinite is only possible here, now. (Rabbi Judah Mischel, BaDerech, PG. 66.)

As Rabbi Mischel explains, we can take this movement as an opportunity to center ourselves in the present, leaving behind the past and future during this few minutes of intimate, one on one time with G-d. I find myself drawn to this idea of physically bringing ourselves into the present moment while we are also mindfully doing so in the form of the opening words of the prayer:

אֲדֹנָי שְׂפָתַי תִּפְתָּח וּפִי יַגִּיד תְּהִלָּתֶֽךָ:

My Master, open my lips, and my mouth will declare Your praise.

When we are in search of mindfulness, we must bring our body and soul together. We must strive for this harmony within who we are.

Prayer: beginning with gratitude

Upon awakening, Jewish custom is to recite the following;

מוֹדֶה אֲנִי לְפָנֶיךָ מלך חַי וְקַיָּם שֶהֶחֱזַרְתָּ בִּי נִשְׁמָתִי בְחֶמְלָה, רַבָּה אֱמוּנָתֶךָ

Modeh ani l’fanecha, melech chai v’kayam, shehechezarta bee nishmati b’chemla, rabbah emunatecha:

I thank You, living and enduring King, for You have graciously returned my soul within me. Great is Your faithfulness.

With these words, one begins the day with the language of gratitude. This awakening meditation is a powerful framework to start the day. As we know, there is a tremendous push within modern psychology to find focus through gratitude. What better way to do that then to start one’s day with this reflection!

For many, getting up in the morning is not a simple act of waking up. Sleep is not merely a time of rest and relaxation. Sleep can be anxiety driven, with stress related dreams. Sleep time can be one of insomnia and tossing and turning. Sleep can be a most frightening of times. And waking up is not always better. Many of us will hear the alarm (or not if we are trained to wake up on our own) and will feel more tired and frustrated than when we were upon going to bed. It can be quite challenging at this moment of negative energy to find gratitude. And yet, this is the custom of many, to express gratitude, even in a perfunctory, check box way, for perhaps if we do pause, even for a second, the words of Modeh Ani might shift one’s entire daily focus.

May we work to find gratitude for all things in life.

Reflections on Communal vs. Individual Prayer

The following are a rough recreation of remarks given in synagogue over Shabbat, August 13-14, 2021:

The question we as a community have been grappling with this summer is, what makes us a community, a congregation, a gathering of people to pray in one location. I have been reflecting on this question for months. What makes a community? Is it similar goals and purpose, a singular language of prayer or is it perhaps our differences?

Since our particular exploration is dependent on prayer as the nature of a synagogue is to be a gathering place to pray as a community, what does this search unveil for us in these weeks leading to Rosh Hashanah? Allow me to offer a couple of approaches on merging the communal with the individual needs we encounter in prayer.

  1. The 6th Rebbe of Chabad, R. Yitzchak Yosef Schneerson, shared an anecdote about prayer that has sat heavily on my mind for many years. (This is found in a work Likkutei Dibburim though I cannot recall exactly where it is, so I am reconstructing this story from memory, so any errors are mine alone). He describes how (I think) his grandfather one time spoke about a non-Chasidic man, describing the man’s virtues, but concluding with the statement, “But there is one flaw the man has…He prays in a minyan (prayer quorum).” This is a strange vignette, yet, I would like to suggest that the statement about praying in a quorum is meant to convey a deeper message. There is much within the Jewish tradition that lends itself to the power and importance of communal prayer. For example, there are certain specific prayers that may only be recited when there is a prayer quorom. The Rebbe is not disparaging communal prayer. Rather, I think he is suggesting that prayer cannot be seen merely as a communal obligation because then a person is liable to get subsumed in the communal, forskaing prayer’s inherent individuality. We must not presume being in community is enough. During the earlier days of the COVID era, when we didn’t have the opportunity to gather together in person, we yearned to be together. At the same time, many of us found something in spending time at home, praying on our own, at our own pace, in a manner that cannot be fully duplicated in a synagogue. Coming back together, slowly but surely since June 2020, was a process of learning how we can bring the new things we learned in our solitude back into our communal setting.
  2. The first Rebbe of Chabad, R. Schneur Zalman of Liadi, the Alter Rebbe, in his work Likkutei Torah, presents the famous metaphor about how in the month leading to Rosh Hashanah, Elul, G-d, in the role of King, is in the field readily accessible. He writes: “Its like a King who is greeted by the people of the city before entering the actual city. They receive the king in the field. And the King receives them, granting permission to whoever would like to get an audience. The king receives everyone with a warm and welcoming countenance. Afterwards, when the king enters the palace, only those who have explicit permission may enter to see the king.” In a letter quoting this passage, the 7th Chabad Rebbe, R. Menachem Mendel Schneerson, defines this experience using the imagery of praying during the month of Elul. We should see ourselves as praying face to face, with no barriers, before Gd. There is nothing in our way during this time. This description expresses the same duality of communal and individual prayer. The community greets the king, greets G-d, yet each individual is granted private time to commune. We need the communal greeting to open the door to the individuality of our being face to face with G-d.
  3. There is a custom among Hasidim and among those who identify with more mystical forms of Jewish worship to recite the words of Leviticus 19:19, “Love your neighbor as yourself” as a preliminary reflection before the formal prayer service each morning. This practice is attributed to R. Isaac Luria. While we each come to prayer with our individual needs, we know how much value there is placed on communal prayer. Communal prayer is seen as carrying a certain strength to overcome judgment upon the individual. There is a power in numbers. Yet, prayer is often an individualistic confrontation with the Almighty. We often bring our own needs into our prayers. Yet, there is concern we would get too preoccupied with our individual needs, so as a meditation, we are to remember that we are gathering as a group. By recognizing how we are to open our hearts to our neighbors like they are ourselves, connecting to each other, we can find the bridge between our individual needs and our communal needs. We remember that we are interdependent.

As we can see from these three examples, prayer is a complicated dance of our individual needs and emotions while simultaneously remembering our responsibility to be together communally in engaged with Gd. If we are just a community gathering, we can often allow the functionality of communal prayer to be the driving force. At the same time, without the community, we aren’t afforded the unique opportunity of this time of year to grow and change as individuals. We cannot be just about ourselves but must connect with one another through a sense of love and heart. This is not an easy balance.

As we continue to navigate and negotiate these needs during this crazy time, may we merit to find the balance that will help guide us smoothly into a new and better year, where we can find a normalcy and stability to continue to inspire each other and grow, both as individuals and as a community.